As an active and observant realtor, I’ve heard a ton of reasons why folks are behind in their mortgages and are facing foreclosure or being forced to do a short sale. The typical reasons are loss of income for a variety of reasons, whether a cut back in work hours, being laid off, one spouse’s income being curtailed, or decreased profits in one’s own business. They are all understandable reasons. And somewhat unavoidable.
Then there’s the dumb excuse, which is becoming far too prevalent. I’m talking about people who co-sign their kid’s mortgage, or continually funnel money to their whiney, manipulative kids so that they can live beyond their means.
I had a client come in recently inquiring about a short sale. When he explained his income versus mortgage costs, I couldn’t see how he could be strapped for money. Then the truth came out. He had co-signed his kid’s mortgage and now the situation had degraded to the point where he was paying the entire $2,000 payment every month. This senior citizen was willing to lose his home and have to become a renter just so he could continue to finance his kid’s lifestyle. Unbelievable.
We call people like this “enablers”. They enable their kids to be irresponsible because they will always come to the rescue and bail them out. How pathetic!
This client staunchly defended giving his kid money. “You’ve gotta do for family,” he repeated several times during our conversation (consultation, actually). He made no apologies for throwing away a lifetime of hardwork and scrimping and saving. Just as long as his kid and family could afford to drive new cars, buy cigarettes and booze, and buy their kids (his grandchildren) all kinds of status-driven material things, he was willing to lose his home.
Parents who do this type of enabling are not doing their kids a favor. In most cases, once the parents are dead and buried, the irresponsible kids now in their 40′s and 50′s will not survive. They don’t have the skills. They’ll lose everything. The cycle continues.
- Mountain Man
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